Find Yourself

Every year, every one of us has same instinct: this is the year I finally change! Gym memberships spike, savings apps register new accounts, journals get filled with aspirations like “get fit,” “save more,” “read more,” or “stress less.” In 2026, surveys show that roughly 80% of people intend to set a resolution, but almost half already admit they won’t see them through, and many simply redefine what a “goal” means to them as the year progresses.  

The familiar pattern persists: by mid-January, resolve fades, so much so that before the month ends, most of us abandon our resolutions!

So what’s going on? Why do these traditions persist, and why so many of us fail?

Problem 1: Goals as Events, Not Systems

Most of us approach New Year goals like the fireworks: start with a fire and a bang, gone up in smoke soon after.

To understand why this happens, we need to understand that something deeper is in play, something neurobiological. Planning itself can give a dopamine hit. Just imagining the new “you” feels so good that the brain rewards you before any useful action happens. But once that anticipation fades, the behavior doesn’t follow.  

The goals we set: “I will lose weight”, “I will get fit”, “I will save more”, are outcomes, not behaviors. They’re abstract and easy to visualize but hard to operationalize.  

This is known as intention–action gap. Intentions without structured triggers and habit mechanics rarely turn into behavior.  

Problem 2: Timing and Context

The context and environment matter, which we almost never take into consideration. Trying to overhaul your life in the depth of winter, with less daylight, holiday exhaustion, and psychological strain, is a rough start. Research suggests starting in early spring can actually yield more sustained success because mood and energy naturally improve.  

The timing issue also affects how we perceive our commitment. January feels like tradition; spring feels like renewal. The emotional context is different, and so is success.

This isn’t just about weather; it’s about biological rhythms, stress load, and meaningful timing.

Problem 3: Surface-Level Goals

Traditional resolutions are typically superficial and extrinsic. They focus on outcomes (lose X, earn Y, reach Z) rather than who you want to become. They’re framed as tasks instead of identity shifts.

This matters because the deeper your brain associates the goal with who you are, the more likely you are to persist.

Resolutions often lack:

• A why aligned with core values (beyond “I should”).
• A system of habits and cues.
• A feedback loop that reinforces consistency.
• A social or environmental structure that supports changes.  

When goals are vague (“be healthier,” “be happier”), the brain doesn’t know where the behavior begins and ends. You need habit scaffolding, or the brain simply defaults back to old patterns.  

The Solution: Work on Identity, not Goals

Goals fail when they ask you to act differently without becoming someone different. Identity work flips that equation.

Instead of asking:

“What do I want to achieve?”

the more effective question is:

“Who do I need to be for this behavior to make sense?”

When identity shifts, behavior stops relying on motivation. A person who is disciplined doesn’t negotiate daily whether to show up. A person who sees themselves as financially responsible doesn’t need willpower to save. Actions become expressions of self-image, not acts of resistance against it.

This is why surface-level goals collapse under stress: they sit on top of an unchanged identity. Identity-based change works because it restructures decision-making at the root. You don’t chase outcomes, you reinforce who you are, one small, repeatable behavior at a time.

Athletes, spiritual practitioners, artists, and successful founders often treat change as a daily practice, not a New Year’s spectacle.

Real transformation doesn’t start with ambition. It starts with alignment.

Your Guide for Real Change in 2026

1. Tie goals to identity and deeply rooted values. Change your goal from “save more money” to “I am someone who protects my financial future”. Let that new identity guide your daily behavior.
2. Redesign your environment. Focus on building the right cues in your environment, remove friction, and structure your world so the new behavior is easier than the old one.  
3. Create systems, not events. Focus on new patterns of behavior that can be sustained indefinitely, not a one-off declaration tied to a calendar date.
4. Anticipate setbacks and plan for them. Tell yourself that life will interfere, and build contingency plans. Having an “if-then” script that keeps you moving forward is as valuable as a well defined goal.

A Final Thought

You are not failing because you lack discipline. You fail because you are trying to force change inside a life that was never designed to support who you are becoming. Identity work isn’t about setting higher goals, it’s about removing the internal friction that keeps pulling you back.

This is where real coaching makes the difference: not by motivating you, but by helping you see why your current goals don’t stick, redesigning the arena you’re operating in, and rebuilding agency so change becomes the natural by-product, not a constant struggle.

If your goals keep resetting every January, the problem isn’t you. You’re just solving the wrong problem.

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Need help identifying why your New Year’s resolution looks the same year after year? Reach out to learn more about how we can work together and get you unstuck!